So, uh, I was in the midst of flipping through loan docs at work this night at I was reflecting on the past and things I've been replaced with when a thought struck me, namely, I suck as a boyfriend! Now before you feel sorry for me and try and say that actually I don't suck (Heh, yea right! Shut-up disembodied voice I just made up for filler!) know that I am not really depressed by the notion, rather I am amused and befuddled in a way by it. Bemused in the fact that it plays right into the situation that I shouldn't get inovlved with anyone because I got a lot of things to fix up in my own life currently and such and then befuddled because it seems as if I'd be a rather distant companion in some senses as if I lack, imagination or something in those things women really love like various surprises and the like. Yes I am comparing myself to something and no it isn't some fictional movie something or other and I don't think it's a bad thing that I am comparing, it's just enlightening in some ways.
Now I'm not a bad guy to say the least, I don't cheat, won't care about other women, would rather be with you than anywhere else (most of the time), I'm a romantic and don't fear my manhood dying because of it, and a bunch of other things. But when I think about it, I sure do have faults and I guess in many ways I fall right into that good guy stereotype where I'll always be there but I'm just not all that spontaneous(though to my credit I can certainly be such at times). If you want wild and crazy, well the world is FULL of those kind of men nowadays. Note that doesn't mean that I'm not fun.
Blah, blah, blah, anyways I've got plenty of things to change up (loosen up perhaps?) about myself and it ain't gonna occur over night. And seeing how I've yet to come across a lady my age that doesn't in some way fall for the more "edgy" guy it appears as if I don't have to worry too much about being caught up in things till I've settled things with myself.
Well this was a strange post, dissect as you wish and please give me your thoughts on...well whatever tickles your fancy...
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